N = NURTURE
Any relationship requires work, especially nurturing. Nurturing includes tender care and encouragement for personal growth. Be aware of the other person’s needs and attempt to be the inspiration, support, resource or partner he or she needs to move forward. This nurturing is necessary both in the other person, and in the relationship itself.
One of the challenges of the sandwich generation (the parents) is to nurture and take care of both the older and younger generations. You can help them out by doing some of the nurturing yourself. As we noted with regard to Generativity, this nurturing can take many forms. It might include sharing some historical facts, taking the other person to your favorite monument and talk about its significance, or joining your younger or older colleague, grandchild, grandparent, mentor, mentee at an event that represents something of importance and value in your own life (such as attending a rally for some cause that is important to you or visiting an antique car show or sporting event with the other person).
K = KINDLE
Kindle means to ignite interest, to encourage, promote and awaken something or someone. The easiest way to do this is to KEEP TALKING! Find the places of mutual blessing in this relationship and kindle a fire there.
This means don’t give up. The fire often doesn’t light up with the first match. The wind blows it out or the wood is wet or green. Try again. Maybe add more wood or reduce the amount of wood. In the case of people rather than fires, it is about trying a new topic, or relate in a different way (perhaps a joke or an old story told in a new way, or asking for advice, or talking a walk with the other person.”
S=STAND
Stand with, stand by and stand for the other person. This often requires unconditional love and acceptance, even in the difficult times. Stand with and stand by your SOULink through good times and bad times. Stand for, become an advocate, of the other person. This does not mean to accept and promote bad choices or behaviors. It means to continue supporting and loving the person, if not the behavior.
There is an old tradition to be found in many cultures. This is the act of standing for another person. We have the remnant of this tradition in our standing at the start of a wedding when the bride comes down the aisle or at a sporting event when we stand in honor of a spectacular play or the retirement of a revered player. We can engage this tradition today by standing in support of another person. We can stand (even many miles away) when our young colleague is about to take a major test at college or is about to propose marriage to a loved one. We can stand when our older colleague is about to undergo major surgery or is about to move into a new home.
We can literally stand next to our special person when they are announcing an important decision in their life that they have deliberated with our gentle guidance. We stand in honor of their courage, their commitment and persistence, and their trusting relationship with us. We stand in honor of their Soul-filled self.
