The Alarm is Not Set
Apparently, it was not obvious to administrators at Western Washington University who erected a barrier on the bridge that would have connected the young and old generation. It seems that the case must be made in clear and compelling fashion for the “obvious” answer—this answer being removal of the barrier and encouraging the generative and soul-full engagement of the young and old generations. The answer at Western Washington was the bridge. It is the same answer in many other sectors of contemporary society: build and strengthen the bridge. Provide encouragement and facilitate meaningful dialogue across these generations.
We know that the alarm has also not been set for many other people, communities and entire societies. Retirement enclaves are set up in ways that not only restrict physical access to those not in the facility, but also discourage psychological and sociological access. As Robert Bellah and his colleagues (Bellah and others, 1985) have noted, American societies are often partitioned by Lifestyle Enclaves with citizens restricting themselves to affiliation with other people of the same age, same socio-economic level, and same interests.
The old ethnic and racially based communities (often identified as “ghettos”) might have exemplified a world of discrimination and isolation; however, they typically encouraged intergenerational communication, with grandparents taking care of grandkids, and neighbors taking care of other neighbors (of all ages). At a recent meeting that both of the authors attended, a conversation took place with one of the other people in attendance. She was an executive coaching serving many people. However, her perspectives and values are still based on her African American heritage. She talked with us about the inter-generational communication and caring that still took place in her community—and about the need for her heirs to preserve this caring, inter-generational foundation.
We supplement this account of the soulful bridge between generations with an interview conducted by one of us [WB] with the co-author of this essay and the author of SOULink. In reflecting on preparation of the 2015 book, JW reflects on the reasons for writing this book and then points to the essential points to be made in this book about inter-generational relationships. She concludes by suggesting what additional ideas have emerged for her since writing SOULink:
We now turn in this essay to further evidence regarding the value of building and maintaining the inter-generational bridge. We then provide some guidelines for ensuring that the interactions among generations on this bridge are richly beneficial for both parties.
Benefiting the Grandparent
A strong case can be made for the benefits that accrue to the grandparent when they choose to spend time with and build a strong relationship with their grandchildren. JW points in our recoded interview to recent research (see also: Wright, 2016, p. 1):
Dr. Sara M. Moorman, an assistant professor in the Department of Sociology and the’ Institute on Aging at Boston College said ‘We found that an emotionally close grandparent-adult grandchild relationship was associated with fewer symptoms of depression for both generations…The greater emotional support grandparents and adult grandchildren received from one another, the better their psychological health.”
In an earlier study, one of us [WB] found through a set of interviews with men and women over 50 that grandparenting can lead to yet about psychological benefit (Bergquist, Greenberg and Klaum, 1993). Those being interviewed were often now grandparents and they frequently reported that they are better grandparents than they were parents—this was particularly the case with the men who were interviewed. It was a matter of both competing priorities during the years of active parenting and a matter of simply being more emotionally mature and attuned people at this older age. As younger people working full time in a job and devoting time to being successful in their career, there was sometimes not enough time for attentive devotion to a child’s needs and wants. After a long day at the office or at the factory, the highest priority was to take a deep breath and read the newspaper—or immediately starting to prepare dinner. Child-care (other than meeting basic needs) would have to wait.
