There were also a considerable number of questions addressed to my physiology and health. Dr. Freud asked about the food I most enjoy eating, about exercises in which I engage, about my sleep habits, and most importantly, about what makes me anxious, happy, sad, and gratified—and how these feelings are manifested in my state of health. I had never been asked about this relationship between feelings and health, even by my primary care physician.
Dr. Freud then turned to his own perspectives regarding the role he plays as a life coach. First, he talked about the importance of childhood experiences in our establishment of priorities and practices during our adult years. He talked about the ways we are “haunted” by the aspirations laid on us as children by our parents, as well as the biases inculcated in us as children by the society and institutions with which we were affiliated. No wonder he spends a considerable amount of time asking about my childhood.
Dr. Freud shared a second perspective about life coaching. He indicated that we “live in our bodies” and “our bodies are attuned to the opportunities and challenges we all face in our lives.” This helps to explain why he focused on my physiology and health.
Finally, Dr. Freud indicated, with some strong feelings, that he believes we human beings need not be “captured” by our childhood or by our body. We can gain an understanding of and control over that which “haunts” us and can freely choose our future. I find this declaration to be inspiring. Furthermore, while he is quite formal, I find Dr. Freud to be kind and friendly. I could see him being kind of a “father figure” for me, even though he is probably not much older than me. I look forward to working with Dr. Freud as a life coach.
Session Two
Dr. Freud asked me about my hopes for the coming year and then about my long-term aspirations. He asked me to envision a wonderful future, even if unrealistic. He then asked me to identify any fears associated with this wonderful future. Also, he asked how I was feeling and how my body was reacting to my immediate hopes, my longer-term aspirations, and my wondrous future. I talked with the good doctor about many things. Perhaps the most important information I provided concerned my feelings of burden regarding the financial pressures I am feeling. I have to set aside a considerable amount of money for my children’s college education. I find myself growing angry regarding what colleges are now charging.
Another major issue concerns my wife’s career. She set aside her promising work as a financial planner to devote herself full-time to child-rearing. Now, with our kids growing older, she can return to this work. However, the field has now become increasingly competitive. And she has lost ground in building a reputation and becoming part of a referral network. She probably has to join one of the major financial planning firms. And she will probably have to take some costly training programs to update and enrich her background and expertise. This is not a good time for me to consider a shift in jobs and a potential drop in pay (or even a period of time with no income). I feel trapped. However, I don’t resent my wife’s wishes, since she sacrificed for our family and me. My feelings are mixed and mostly negative and tinged with anger.
