Katherine:
“There was a second dream that I had last night. It was quite different. Just before going to bed, I had spent some time thinking about my meeting with you today. This second dream took place on a beach that I love to visit in Hawaii. My ex-husband and I traveled to this beach several times to celebrate our anniversary. Surprisingly, I was walking on the beach not with my husband, but rather with that same Indian man. He was talking this time not about love or family relationships; rather, he was talking about my career and my future plans. Mostly, he was telling me not to care so much about my career or my future life. It was a big like what you were saying during one of our first sessions together.”
Sonya:
“I wonder if this wise man from India could be representing Krishnamurti, the person I have mentioned several times, who has offered a perspective on life that I have often shared with you.”
Katherine:
“Yes, it could be this man with the long name. Am I falling in love with him rather than with you—like I am supposed to do in psychotherapy [both Katherine and Sonya begin to laugh a bit.]”
Sonya:
“I don’t think it is about love or lust on your part. However, your dream might be representing the way in which you are beginning to absorb some of that strange man with the long name is teaching you through me. Krishnamurti often suggested that we learn through falling in love with someone or even more frequently with a strong personal experience. You may have been open to new ideas when in that fragrant garden of the first dream, or when suddenly trusting that man you met in the Garden. This has little to do with lust, but a lot to do with learning.
So, tell me what happened when you were walking with this man on the beach at your special location in Hawaii.”
Katherine responds:
“It is a bit embarrassing for me to recount what this man said and how I responded. He asked me to describe who my “outside person” is. He used this phrase: the “outside person.” I began to mention how other people see me and how my children and ex-husband see me. The wise man and I walked to the end of the beach, where there were large rock formations. I spend the entire time during this walk talking about my “outside person.” He and I then climbed up a set of rocks and sat down on a long bench-like rock. Both of us were silent and simply looked out at the ocean and the waves breaking on the rocks. The wide man then made a second request. He said: tell me about your “inside person.” I was stumped. He gently prodded: what are the characteristics of the person who resides behind the mask? I still had nothing to say. And then I cried a bit. I soon became quite angry with the way this man whom I don’t really know were pushing me to disclose very personal things about myself. I scrambled down off the rocks and ran back across the beach. I woke up and felt many different things: anger, fear, sorrow . . . and even a bit of joy. I rapidly wrote down the content of this dream in this diary.”
Kathleen showed Sonya the pages of the diary on which she had recorded this dream. Sonya noticed that there were also drawings on the page. There were skillfully and carefully drawn sketches of sea birds and of waves. There was also a drawing of a young girl running on the beach.
