The difference between the extravert and introvert is that the extravert is inclined to express their desire to move forward and their frustration when there is no movement. The introvert is more likely to sit back and “stew.” They might make sarcastic comments or express disdain through their nonverbal behavior. While the introverted Ruby Red might simply be reticent about forcefully expressing their wishes because they don’t want “push back,” it might instead be a matter of energy conservation. It takes a lot of energy to lead, and as we have noted, the introvert doesn’t have a great deal of interpersonal energy and wants to preserve what they have. Hans Eysenck might enter at this point. He would suggest that a large bundle of information and noise enters our world when we take on a leadership role. An introvert finds it hard to screen out all of the stimulation that comes with active leadership. They can instead sit back, stew a bit about the direction in which their group or team is moving, and screen out a whole lot of what is actually occurring in the group. They place a bubble over themselves and become the frozen marsupial.
The Ruby Red Relationship
In their interactions with other people, the extraverted Ruby Red person tends to be assertive and quite clear about what they would like to see in (and want from) their relationships. They tend to build their relationship around shared engagements. The introverted Ruby Red is more inclined to avoid building any intense relationships that are wrapped around shared engagements. However, like the extraverted Ruby Reds, the introverted Reds find their relationships with other people to be most pleasing for them when their group or team accomplishes something important (and perhaps even unanticipated). “Clubhouse morale” is particularly important for the Ruby Red introvert, especially if they have been called on to provide leadership “in the nick of time.” The best working environment for someone with a Ruby Red preference (whether introverted or extraverted) is one in which there exists strong formal accountability. It is an environment in which there are concise and often quantifiable goals (management by objectives) and in which costs and benefits can be enumerated (return on investment). “I want to know when I have scored a point and don’t want the goal posts to be moving!”
Karen Horney (Horney, 1992) is a noted and often controversial psychoanalyst. She was one of the first analysts to challenge Sigmund Freud’s theory about the Oedipus Complex and the female’s envy of men. She was also among the first analysts to write books for a lay population and, in doing so, presented a compelling theory regarding interpersonal relationships. She suggested that each of us, under conditions of anxiety (especially if it is related to our relationship with other people), is inclined to take one of three actions in relating to other people. We can move toward other people, away from other people, or against other people. Her description of a preference to move against other people fits with our description of the Ruby Red person. When confronted with a difficult or contentious relationship, the Ruby Red person will push against and often confront the other person if they are extraverted. Or they will hold a smoldering (but nonarticulated) grudge against the other person if they have assumed an introverted attitude.
