Commenting on her own insistence on creating the physical environment of their home, Bev indicated: “I didn’t know whether it would be OK with you that I was so controlling.” Teresa laughed again: “I don’t think I knew just how controlling you would be.” This interchange reflected the central dynamics of their relationship both inside and outside their home. Teresa is apparently willing to let Bev set the tone and the terms of their relationship, as well as control the nature and tone of the home they establish together.
Teresa, however, also steps in at appropriate times to change the direction of their relationship (and their home) when appropriate. According to Teresa: “I always feel like Bev’s the Rock of Gibraltar, but she has her black moods too, and sometimes it’s nice for me to be the floating Rock of Gibraltar.” Bev, in turn, recognizes and appreciates Teresa’s easy-going acceptance and her role as the “floating rock” in their relationship. Above all, Bev and Teresa have discovered the saving grace of humor and the related understanding of one another, their relationship together, and their common bond.
Their home (like most homes) reflects their relationship and their common bond. These women are very proud of their residence, even though Bev makes most of the initial decisions regarding interior and exterior decoration (as the solid rock). Furthermore, both of them find their home (arid their relationship) to be very comfortable and comforting, often building on Teresa’s more intuitive sense of home and relationship (as the floating rock). They speak of companionship as being at the heart of their relationship and identify their residence as a sanctuary where they can come together and not feel so lonely. Bev puts it this way: “We’re both kind of loners in a weird kind of way in the rest of the world, and you just want to have one other person that’s going to be around ’cause you don’t want to be lonely.”
Their home, however, is also designed to provide each of them with their own personal space. As part-time artists, each woman has her own studio. “It’s really important to have your total own space,” Bev explains. “The great thing about pretending to be artists [as both Bev and Teresa do] is you get to have a studio.” Teresa’s previous partner “thought art took me away from her. I wasn’t allowed to go into my own world and spend any time and I certainly couldn’t get any help on a critique [laughter]. But Bev’s a really great cheerleader. At the same time, she’s really honest about my work — that’s why I need the pep talk sometimes.” Both women laughed. Bev responded: “I couldn’t like you if I didn’t like your work. I can’t imagine I could like you if here was a whole area I didn’t want to talk about or see.”
