What specifically are these developmental plates for couples and how do they interact? From our research, we propose there are five that are applicable to most couples: (1) establishing a home, (2) producing socio-economic viability, (3) selecting values, (4) preparing for loss of partner and (5) raising children. Any one of these plates may be prevalent at any one point in the life of a couple, though the first and second plates generally tend to be foremost early in a relationship, while the fourth plate tends to be foremost at a later point. Each plate can exist in close interaction with one or more of the other plates, and strongly influences the other four plates as well as the individual developmental stages of each member of the couple.
Typically, a couple will experience a period of stress when things aren’t going well with one or more of the developmental plates The stress may be exacerbated when there is trouble simultaneously with several plates or when three or four of the plates are simultaneously colliding with one another, as when partners are confronted with a new child, while also establishing a first home and starting new jobs.
Each developmental plate has its own phases of development in the life of each couple,. The four phases we described in the second section of this book (forming, storming, norming and performing) are played out in each plate. These four phases interact in an infinite variety of ways, as members of a couple confront the developmental tasks associated with each of the plates in various relationships to other tasks and plates, and at various points in each member’s own individual stage of development. The way in which each task is engaged by a couple will vary widely from couple to couple, and even within the same couple from year to year. Despite these complexities and variations, we can identify several major features in each of the five developmental plates.
I will describe each plate in the following five essays, mapping out the terrain that typically traverse as couple on each plate. We begin this journey, in this essay, with a description of the first plate: establishing a home.
