Educating about Table Manners
Participants reflected that not having technology present during mealtime allows them to educate and teach their family members about table manners.
Monica reported with some detail about how not allowing technology during mealtime has contributed to her ability to explain the rules around the table to her family members.
How- how to even use the fork and a knife. How to eat properly, how to . . . learn how to communicate. Wi- without your mouth being full, those, those simple things but those um, politeness things that you learn around, at a table. Um, safe, [inaudible], feelings towards life. (Monica, 2nd interview)
Sally also reported the importance of teaching her family members about table manners during mealtime.
It’s an opportunity for uh, for th-, for us to teach them table manners. (Sally, 2nd interview)
It’s very very important to us that our children know how to sit around a table, use their cutlery well, um you know present themselves well around, around uh you know a table eating all of those things. (Sally, 2nd interview)
Parenting
Mothers also reflected that not allowing technology during mealtime allows them to explain to their children their values, to give lessons, to praise, to correct their children when needed, to introduce rules, to model things, and to explain situations.
Monica described mealtime as an opportunity to explain situations to her children, providing explanations and/or recommendation without forgetting to reinforce and to reward when that is merited.
And that, we could also use that time to give lessons. (Monica, 1st interview)
or praise them or, you know, talk about situations or things like that. (Monica, 1st interview)
Sally reflected in the same way, providing an opportunity to go over things with her children.
And, um, the kids have actually mentioned sometimes, you know, “So and so’s family lets them do that when they’re eating.” And I said, “Yeah. And so and so’s family may not even sit at a table at dinnertime. Um, and that’s okay for them and they’re comfortable. That’s really not okay for us. I want to talk to you. I want to, you know, learn about your day. I want to do all of those things. And, and I actually love it.” And I think when kids hear you say that to them, you know, “I love spending time with you. And I know it takes you away from your tablet and so on, but I love that we’re sitting here and talking.” (Sally, 1st interview)
For her, mealtime allows the opportunity to explain the family rules.
And that’s not just to model something positive for the children, it’s our house rules. (Sally, 2nd interview)
Brie also described as one of the reasons she disallows technology during mealtime has to do with talking with her children about what is important for her:
So I think it’s important . . . To talk about something else, uh, I think it actually is important to teach kids, when they grow up, to learn to take time aside and not just move at a hundred miles an hour . . . and learn how to recoup and rest and . . . for their own health, in the future (Brie, 2nd interview)
Sharing Information
Only one participant reported that one of the reasons for disallowing technology during mealtime has to do with sharing general information in general. Olivia reported that mealtime allows her an opportunity to find out about the events of her children’s day, to get to know things about what happened when she was not with her children. For Olivia:
I think, um, often I find out about things that happen at school at dinnertime and if I didn’t have that time, I never would know that there was a problem at school, or there was a problem with a friend, or there was a problem with the teacher, or that they didn’t understand something in math or in English. It’s a time for me to actually hear about what’s happening the rest of the day when I’m not with them. (Olivia, 2nd interview)
