The New Johari Window #23: Quadrant Two: Interpersonal Needs

The New Johari Window #23: Quadrant Two: Interpersonal Needs

Conversely, those with an external locus look to reactive strategies, and try to place themselves in settings where other people will be cognizant of their interpersonal needs and will attempt to fulfill these needs. Those with an external locus, for instance, might seek out a friendly tavern or (at the opposite end of the spectrum) a welcoming church or temple. With these general observations about proactive and reactive needs expression in mind, let us turn specifically to the three interpersonal needs identified by Will Schutz.

Inclusion

Those with a strong need for inclusion and an external locus (reactive) focus must address a fundamental interpersonal issue: “Do they really want me?” This fundamental question is closely tied to their sense of self-esteem and sense of vulnerability. There are two closely related statements: “I want others to invite me to join the group and want others to be involved in the selection of other group members.” “I fear that I will be left out of a group of which I want to be a member or that I will be involved with a group that isn’t really very inviting.”

As we turn specifically to Quad Two, the primary issue is: “Do other people accurately assess the extent to which I wish to be included in a specific relationship [or group]?” If I have a high need for inclusion, then the answer to this question is particularly important. If other people don’t know I want to be included, then they might not invite me in.

A second factor might be even more important: if other people don’t want me to be included in a specific relationship or group, then they are unlikely to invite me in, even if they sense that I want to be included. Similarly, if they do not themselves have a strong need for inclusion, then they are likely to ignore our reactive expression of inclusion needs. On the other hand, if they would like me to be included, have a relatively high need for inclusion themselves, and observe (or infer) our wish to be included, then they are likely to invite us in.

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About the Author

William BergquistWilliam Bergquist, Ph.D. An international coach and consultant in the fields of psychology, management and public administration, author of more than 50 books, and president of a psychology institute. Dr. Bergquist consults on and writes about personal, group, organizational and societal transitions and transformations. His published work ranges from the personal transitions of men and women in their 50s and the struggles of men and women in recovering from strokes to the experiences of freedom among the men and women of Eastern Europe following the collapse of the Soviet Union. In recent years, Bergquist has focused on the processes of organizational coaching. He is coauthor with Agnes Mura of coachbook, co-founder of the International Journal of Coaching in Organizations and co-founder of the International Consortium for Coaching in Organizations.

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