There is an old saying that there is no one more beautiful and lovable then someone who loves us. This is an exquisite (and sometimes painful) example of the “psychic echo.” Person A is in love with Person B. She identifies some characteristics in Person B that Person B is trying to convey to the world (“I am clever.” “I am handsome.” “I am sensitive.”). Person A accepts this feature in Person B and reconfirms it with Person B through her (Person A’s) actions, nonverbal expressions, and feedback. Person B is delighted to receive this confirmation and, in turn, is more likely to acknowledge, accept, appreciate and reconfirm the projected self-images of Person A. As a result, both Person A and Person B appear to be even more beautiful, smart, and talented to one another. They are both confirming each other’s desired self-images. Beauty is, indeed, in the eye of the beholder.
Similarly, in a group, Person A may be assigned the role of “peacemaker” or “intellectual.” Person A unconsciously accepts this role (the influence of Q4), accepts projections and reinforcements by other members of the group, and suddenly becomes the peacemaker or intellectual. When the assigned role is valued by the group, then everyone in the group colludes to make Person A highly skillful in this role. Person A becomes a terrific peacemaker or intellectual. Alternatively, if Person A is assigned (and accepts—sometimes by subtle or not so subtle coercion) a role that is not valued, then group members collude (with Person A’s concurrence—another Q4 intrusion) to “deskill” Person A in this role. As a peacemaker, Person A creates more conflict than he resolves. As an intellectual, Person A is remarkably dense and insensitive to what is going on around her.
The roles played by “peacemaker” and “intellectual” in a group can be quite powerful and the feedback “echo” can be quite distorted given the unconscious needs of the group. There are even more powerful (and primitive) roles, however, that are played out in groups—especially groups that are under pressure. We find, for instance, the idealized self being played out as a role in some groups. One member of the group becomes almost “saint-like.” She is unable to do anything wrong and she may begin to believe in her own perfection.
