At this point in the relationship, there is usually little more that can be done—we face interpersonal constipation. “I have learned a lot about myself and I know you know a lot about me that you haven’t shared. However, at this point, I don’t trust (all three types) you or the setting sufficiently to try expanding Quad One either through disclosure or feedback.” As you will note with this graphic portrayal, there is actually a thin corridor (not just a line) between Quad One and Quad Four. This suggests that if there is a move from Quad Four to Quad One it will be quite an eruption. Jungians might suggest that the shadow has taken full control. Those with expertise in psychopathology might even predict a nervous breakdown—or the emergence of a psychotic episode.
This scenario speaks to the harm that can come from the temporary loss of discrete control over one’s disclosures—resulting either from creation of a temporary environment that encourages inappropriate disclosure (a powerful but poorly conceived personal growth workshop) or from production of mind-numbing and disinhibiting neurochemicals (generated by the brain in response to passion or in response to ingestion of alcohol or some other toxic drug). We all know that these conditions are to be avoided—and caution our own children about these conditions. Yet we find ourselves even as mature and responsible adults lured into events or consuming drugs that lead us to temporary “highs” and mind-altering exposure to Quad Four material. These temporary lapses in Quad Four inhibitions leave us, in the end, regretful, embarrassed and angry regarding our short-term flirtation with fourth quadrant and sharing of material from this quadrant.
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Footnotes
i Kets de Vries, Manfred. Leaders, Fools and Imposters. New York: iUniverse, 2003.
iiKets de Vries, Manfred. Leaders, Fools and Imposters. New York: iUniverse, 2003, p. 62.
iiiKets de Vries, Manfred. Leaders, Fools and Imposters. New York: iUniverse, 2003, p. 62.
ivKets de Vries, Manfred. Leaders, Fools and Imposters. New York: iUniverse, 2003, p. 63.
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