The Dynamics of Interpersonal Relationships
“Carl Jung’s two personality types [Extraversion and Introversion] have an important impact on the nature, extent and type of relationships that are being engaged. Introverts are likely to be very selective in their choice of other people with whom to establish a relationship. There has to be a very good reason to engage in either a transactional or autotelic relationship. For the introvert a transactional relationship is likely to be engaged if the project in which both people are involved is compelling. An autotelic relationship is engaged by an Introvert when it holds the potential of being deep and enduring. Unlike the Introvert, an Extravert will tend to welcome and even seek out relationships. The prospect of a transactional relationship being attractive to someone who is an Extravert revolves around the potential for action and achievement. An autotelic relationship will be attractive to an Extravert if the other person appears to be interesting. They offer something new and different. The potential is there for an exciting (even unpredictable) relationship.”
Bergquist: Loneliness—Sociological Perspective
“Individualism is a major culprit in American culture. With an emphasis on individual identity and achievement comes a pervasive pull toward competition and push away from community. Competing egos are forged and found in the American marketplace. These egos expand in size as American organizations become (and are glorified for becoming) BIG. To be small is to have lost the battle for supremacy. To be large and controlling of a specific sector of American society is to have won the battle. Along with the competition comes an emphasis on private ownership. We try to minimize, circumvent, or deny the interdependence upon which all human societies are based. We look for (and long for) what Philip Slater identifies as the ‘Freedom Fix.’”
Bergquist: Loneliness—Psychological and Existential Perspective
“Evolution favors interpersonal relationships among human beings. Isolation is contrary to the survival of the human species—and even to its continuing improvement (via cultural learning). In order to keep people from choosing a life of separation, some biological mechanisms are built in to make this separation painful and alien from a life of physical and mental health. We are “wired” to be with other people and are biologically “punished” for choosing otherwise. Yet not all people suffer from being alone. The condition of loneliness might not apply to them. Why is this the case? The answer is to be found in the study of individual experiences with regard to being alone. This requires that we introduce a psychological and existential perspective on loneliness.”
